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Monday, September 28, 2015

Wake mi up when September end!

Finally September is going to end.. 
I had a long and bad September which impacted my family and myself alot.. 

It's supposed to be a happy and 幸福 for my family, especially for my brother and his wife.. Baby Deon Loh is born on the 2nd September 2015.. All of us was so excited for his arrival.. Of course for mi, coz 我做姑姑了... I actually so excited that I rushed down to the hospital waited outside the delivery ward..
Non of us expected this unfortunate incident gonna happen, non of us are prepare for it at all.. It was really huge impact for our family especially my brother and my sister-in-law family... 
My sil actually discharged and went home to rest after 3 days after giving birth..
Yes, to many ppl, this is berry common.. On the following day 5th September (which is a Saturday and a day before my brother's birthday), my sil had a slip in the toilet and had a nasty hit on her head.. This hit resulted a big blood clot to form in her right brain.. Operation was successful, the blood clot had been removed but she has been comatose till today.. 
Despite all the medical reports and doctors prognosis, we are still praying for her, praying for her to open her eye someday..
If anyone of you are reading this, please do a minute of your time to pray for her conscious..
Dear Girl, I just want you to noe that all of us are waiting for you to wake up.. You dun have to worry about anything coz all of us willing to pei you walk through every obstacles... We just need you to wake up..

As for myself, I finally willing to talk abt it..
Everything happen on the week that my sil admitted hospital.. Timing just right and I can't help to blame myself..
I'm really sorry..
I had been berry strong, strong enough that I didn't breakdown when I'm with my brother.. Usually I'm always the first one to breakdown crying... This time, I think I need to stay strong at least for my brother.. I dun wish to cry in front of him as I noe if I do so, he will feel even more down..
But my tears just can't stop running once I reach home, even when I watch Taiwan drama I will think of my sil..
I think I may have tired my body by rushing to the hospital every now and then without resting.. Plus went to bai bai and also ask my brother along to go bai bai due to 7th month...
Yes I had a miscarriage.. This impact mi deeply..
I'm sorry I didn't know you are inside mi if not I will definitely take extra care of myself and will definitely wun tired myself..
I know I need to let go and I already do..
Really gonna thanks Hubb and biaojie for keeping at my side..
Thank you BiaoJie for the flowers and birdnest.. Thank you for accompanying whenever Kevin is not by my side... Appreciate if alot.. At least I feel that there's someone in my family actually care abt mi..
Okay talk abt this.. not that I was bother abt nobody care abt mi just that I hate it when someone telling mi to eat confinement food, this and that as if I know how to prepare the food and drink and know what to eat what not to eat.. I dun expect she to come my hse to cook for mi la but just a call away, I wun mind but to rush down to just to eat de.. But do you care??
At least I had a good look on you..
Thank you Hubb for staying by my side.. I know you are equally sad just that you need to stay calm and strong for mi.. I feel it..Thank you for treating mi like princess though you always treat mi as one.. I promise from now on, I will take good care of myself ..
I love you!

❤️To the baby in mi for less den a week❤️
I'm sorry that I didn't know you are in mi and I'm sorry that I didn't take good care of you..
I'm sorry that I didn't get the chance to say hello to you
I'm sorry that I didn't even got the chance to say goodbye to you..
You will always remain in my heart..
I love you!

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